The Epic Sock Journey
by Emmychao
Summary: RedxLeaf. All the former champ wants is a new pair of socks? Wait, what? With that in mind, Leaf sets out on an epic quest to get those socks... at all costs. Semi-crack.


"How are you feeling today, Mr. Champion?"

"_Former_ champion," he corrected as always. Likewise, I pouted at his answer… as always.

"Anyway," I made a motion to signal that I wasn't lingering on that subject today. "I was going shopping and wanted to know if there was anything you wanted."

Red's hands came to rest on his hips to show he was thinking. I shifted uncomfortably, once again realizing how much room there wasn't on the summit of Mt. Silver. Then an idea struck me. What if he didn't need me to get him anything? He was a champion after all. If there was anything he wanted, he could probably just go get it himself…

"A new pair of socks."

"Pardon?" I snapped my head back to him in time to see him unceremoniously cough into his collar. "What was –"

"Don't worry about it," he shot back hastily. His Pikachu's head suddenly popped up over his shoulder and began waving to get my attention. Curiously, I watched him make an "x" with his stubby arms.

"No?" I mouthed to him silently. He nodded vigorously until Red noticed and started to reach for him. What did that mean?

… Oh! Did that mean that Red really wanted –

"_Pikachu!_" I glanced back at Red and saw that he was lightly scolding his favorite pokémon. The next part he said, I couldn't catch at all.

Raising my fist to my chest in determination, I resolved to buy socks for Red… at any cost.

* * *

"Come on, Pidgeot!" I clutched my beloved hat to my head, my hair whipping around wildly from the speed of my pokémon's flight. "We have to get some brand new socks for Red!"

His head shifted so he could see me out of the corner of his eye. I could see the disbelief on his face as plain as day. With a huff, I gave the bird a good kick in the side to show I was completely serious. It was only a second later that I realized my error.

"Waah! Wrong way, Pidgeot! That way! _That way! Ahh!_" That kick had changed Pidgeot's flight enough to send us right into the path of a great big tree. Pidgeot luckily gained his bearings and got us back into the air before the ground could turn into a real threat.

This was why I never became a champion.

It didn't take long for Pallet Town to become visible… except that wasn't our destination. I turned Pidgeot's course slightly, so we were headed to the north towards Viridian City. Once we had safely made it within city bounds, I let out a sigh of relief. I had sworn to get Red some new socks at any cost, but I never knew I'd have to deal with any real danger on the job despite how much of it was actually my fault.

"Okay, Pidgeot, land in front of the Pokémon Center, please." Fortunately, he did as he was told without any mishaps. The moment my feet touched the ground, I pulled his pokéball out and recalled him. I glanced around the city idly, subconsciously crossing my arms. PokéMart, PokéMart… Something lightly hit the top of my head.

"Yo."

That voice… I whirled around with a mind to punch its owner. He blocked the hit, though, and smiled as though I hadn't just tried to inflict harm upon him.

"Not every day I see you here, Leaf," he commented with a smirk. I turned away with the intention of leaving him behind. "H-hey! I'm trying to be nice here!"

"Socks for Red, socks for Red," I chanted quietly, trying to ditch Green. Unfortunately, I wasn't watching where I was going and bumped into an unsuspecting passerby.

"Ah," I bowed slightly to show I was in a hurry. "Sorry."

"Look what you did, Leaf. You bumped into poor lil' Kotone."

I clenched my fist, preparing to swing it at my rival. "Shut up, Green! I apologized, didn't I?"

"E-eh? It's okay, really." I turned back to the smaller girl and smiled apologetically.

"Hmm, now that I think about it… what brings you two here to my city today?"

I scoffed at "my city" and turned away from the arrogant punk that was the city's gym leader.

"I'm on an errand for Red." The younger girl turned to me with a look of amazement.

"You know him?"

"Huh? Yeah, we both grew up together in Pallet Town."

"With me," Green added. Kotone didn't seem to hear him, though, and her eyes lit up suddenly.

"Are you two lovers?" she asked excitedly. I blanched at her innocent question while Green just laughed.

"Oh, she wishes."

My fist finally found its mark in his stomach.

"Why don't the two of us leave this _brat_ here and go elsewhere?" She didn't seem so sure. "I'll tell you a little about Red?"

"Okay! Let's go!"

* * *

"So you _do_ like him!"

I shrank back into my imaginary corner of darkness. Even she saw right through me!

"Yeah, but Red's _really_ dense. Well, not to say that he's dumb or anything, he just doesn't notice my…" I gulped, "… _feelings_."

First it was my life on the line, and now it was my feelings.

"Maybe Hibiki can help…"

"Hmm?" I raised my eyes to meet Kotone's determined ones and tilted my head slightly. "Who?"

"Hibiki's my boyfriend," she said matter-of-factly. I felt my mood instantly darken; she already had a boyfriend? "Ah! Well, I mean, um… future boyfriend! We haven't actually confessed or anything, but I know it'll happen soon."

"Eh? What the heck?" I blurted out immediately, partially from relief and partially from confusion.

"D-don't…" she trailed off for a moment, her face flushed from embarrassment. "Don't judge me!"

"Yeah, yeah," I said with a wave of my hand. "Just call your boyfriend."

"Kotone?" We both whirled around and saw a boy with dark hair and a backwards cap. I glanced at Kotone and laughed inwardly at how her cheeks rivaled a Pikachu's.

"H-Hibiki!"

Out of curiosity, I glanced at my pokégear and realized that I didn't have time to play with these two. I stood up, grabbed their shoulders, and pushed them together with a large, Cheshire grin.

"Do me a favor and go on a date, or something," I told the two lovebirds and set out once again for the PokéMart. "The Cerulean Cape is a good date spot," I called over my shoulder. "Even ask Misty!"

At that moment, a leg was flying at me from one of the trees followed shortly after by a body. I craned my neck to the left and somehow miraculously avoided the entire attack. Behind me, I heard a loud thud and a very feminine squeak. I turned slightly to get a look at my assailant and cocked an eyebrow.

"Well, speak of the devil."

"Who's the devil here?"

I put a hand on my hip and scratched my chin in thought with the other. "You?"

She barely gave me enough time to block her fist.

"That's not very nice, Misty," I scolded through gritted teeth. She growled and put even more pressure into her punch.

"Neither is talking about others behind their backs," she shot back with a menacing smile.

"Oh?" I sidestepped, causing the gym leader to fall to the ground with nothing left to brace against. "I thought it was only talking behind your back if you weren't there or stalking the person to hear it?"

"Oh, it's on."

I was about to get into my battle stance but remembered that I really didn't have time for this.

"No, uh, actually," I took my hat off and ran a hand through my hair bashfully. "I need to go get something for Red…"

A pokéball hit me square in the face.

"That's it!" I unclipped a pokéball from my belt as well and got into position. "It's on!"

* * *

"Aw, come on!"

I threw the controller down triumphantly and began to dance around the disgruntled gym leader.

"Hate the game, not the player!"

"How the heck can you beat two max AI level Pikachus like that? With a Jigglypuff, no less! Argh!"

"I'm just that awesome," I said with a swish of my hair. Once Misty had thrown down her remote and nunchuk set and stormed off, I pulled my pokégear out to check the time. "Ah, crap."

I tiptoed my way out of the gym but one of Misty's lackeys had noticed.

"Ah," was all I could say.

"She's trying to get away!"

Suddenly, a bunch of swimmers popped out of the pool, pokéballs raised for battle.

"Not the water ninjas!" I cried sarcastically. That was when a giant metal Magikarp emerged from behind all of them. "Err, um, never mind?"

"Get her!"

It didn't take a genius to know that this wasn't good news at all. I unclipped Pidgeot's pokéball and released him outside ahead of me. "Get ready to fly!"

I had my running start and jumped onto the large bird's back just as he was taking off. He gave me a look that clearly asked what I had done, but I waved it off with a relieved smile. I pointed down to the South.

"We'll have to try Saffron City," I told him. The flight continued in relative silence, and I had to admit that I was pleased when we made it without further troubles. I practically skipped to the PokéMart, and once I had entered, I felt as though I had already accomplished my task…

"No more socks?" I practically screamed in despair. A clerk walked over to me with a worried look.

"Yes, I'm afraid so. There've been various sightings of a young, red-haired boy going to all of the PokéMarts in the region and buying… all socks in stock."

Great, another redhead. I clenched my fists and left the store with as much dignity as I could muster. The clerk from earlier hurriedly followed me out and gently tapped me on the shoulder.

"In fact, the boy just bought them a few minutes ago… I believe he went that way."

"Thank you," I said with the sweetest smile I could muster. The moment she had left, however, my smile became the most threatening one in existence.

That boy was _so_ dead!

* * *

"You."

"What?" he asked with an arrogant tone that I absolutely hated. "You have a problem?"

"Socks."

He huffed, clutching the bag closer to his chest.

"They're mine. I bought them with my own money!"

I tossed a handful of change at him.

"No, they're mine!"

Why he was so hell bent on keeping all those socks to himself was beyond me.

From one of his pokéballs emerged a Snorlax. The boy glared at me before turning to the pokémon and lovingly handing it some socks. The Snorlax brightened up at the sight of them and shoved them into his mouth without a second thought. I blanched at this turn of events.

"Your Snorlax eats socks?"

"Yeah! What of it?"

I unclipped a pokéball from my belt and got into position to battle once again. The boy took a step back and grabbed one of his own. There was a moment of silence as we stared each other down. Finally, I threw my pokéball with an angry yell.

"That's not healthy!"

Out of the water behind me came a giant, metal Magikarp.

"Holy crap!" I fell forward from the force of the water and smiled at the fact that the boy got knocked over as well. The pokéball I had thrown earlier had somehow miraculously bounced back to me. The Magikarp's mouth opened and out stepped Misty. She narrowed her eyes at me and put her hands on her hips.

"Our match wasn't over yet!"

"I think someone's just a sore loser," I commented to the red-haired boy. He snickered with me, making me feel as though he wasn't all that bad after all.

"I heard that!"

I sat up and scratched my head. That's when I realized…

"Hey, where'd my hat go?" I whipped my head around in time to see the water carry it around the bend of trees and out of sight. My eyes narrowed into dangerous slits.

"_See, now we match,"_ Red had told me when he got me that hat for my birthday. That was before we had started our journeys…

I stood up with a dark aura that made everyone in the area flinch.

"Pikachu," I called darkly, and released the electric pokémon. She turned to look at me and almost burst into a fit of fearful tears at the sight of me. "Discharge."

* * *

"It was my favorite hat in the whole wide world!" I cried dramatically into Silver's shoulder. The younger boy awkwardly patted my back. After my earlier demonstration of just how much power I wielded, he quickly made amends with me and decided not to get on my bad side again.

"Uh," he started uncomfortably. "I'll give you some socks?"

I instantly brightened up at that, but only slightly. I accepted the large pack of socks gratefully and waved to him in farewell.

"See you around, Silver."

He just raised one hand dismissively and disappeared down the old dirt trail. Glumly, I turned back toward the mountain and came face-to-face with the last person I expected.

"Aren't you cold with your clothes soaked through like that?"

Weakly, I looked down with tear-brimmed eyes and stubbornly rubbed at them with my wet sleeve. That only succeeded in making my face wetter. When I moved my arm away from my face, I remembered the socks that I had gone through so much trouble to get and held the package out to him.

"Socks for you," I hiccupped, still refusing to look up and meet his eyes. He took the gift carefully and slipped into silence. Then I heard him hum in confusion.

"Hmm, aren't you missing something?"

I immediately shot my head up to explain myself, but the moment I did, he pulled something soft and dry down on my head. Tentatively, I reached up to touch it and realized that I knew exactly what it was.

"Much better," he commented with a small smile. He patted the top of my head affectionately like he always did when we were younger. "And thanks for the socks."

"You better take good care of them," I warned with one last sniffle. "I went through a lot of trouble to get them."

Red didn't reply and just leaned forward. I felt a brief weight on my head that was gone almost as fast as it came and tilted my head in confusion. He took a step back and refused to look at me with his flushed face…

Wait, flushed?

"Red, did you just –"

"Ooh, look at the mood you two have here." A set of arms snaked around Red's shoulders and mine, and I looked up to see Green smirking at us. Within seconds, Red's fist had found its way to Green's stomach and knocked the wind out of him.

"I'm going back…"

"I'll come with you!" I volunteered. He stopped and gave me a level look before taking me by the shoulders and leading me in the opposite direction. "H-huh? Where are we going?"

"You need to change out of your wet clothes first," he reminded me. "I don't want you to get sick."

"Okay!"

"W-wait for me…" Green called weakly. I glanced back at him with the intention of blowing a raspberry at him, but didn't have the chance to. A giant metal Magikarp fell from the sky.

"So, that's where it went," Red commented. I turned to face him and saw the ghost of a smirk on his face.

"What'd you –" He cut me off with a quick peck and led us away with a quickened pace.

"Nothing, dear. Just keep going."

* * *

"Mou!" Misty stomped her foot and looked at the wreckage that was once her plaything. "Red's so mean!"

"What'd he do, out of curiosity?" Green warily eyed the contraption that came very close to ending his playboy days.

"Well, I was going after Leaf for a rematch when Red came out of nowhere. Of course, I didn't really pay much attention to him, but he got all scary at the same time as Leaf." Misty kicked a pebble disinterestedly and crossed her arms before continuing with her recollection, "After Leaf sent her Pikachu on us and ran off crying, Red finally popped up and sent this thing flying. Truth be told, I thought it was halfway to Johto already."

"You know," Green started with half-lidded eyes, "I didn't expect you to be the Magikarp-type. Why not something like an Eevee instead?"

The last thing he saw before blacking out was a very pissed Misty and what appeared to be a fist.


End file.
